Last week was a lesson in listening to the signs of the universe. Because shortly after I posted last week’s reading, I managed to lose six cards from that deck. Randomly. Scattered throughout the house. Reflecting my own scattered-brain tendencies, I decided to take that as a signal that sometimes I need to detach from what I thought I wanted (to reintroduce myself to one of my first decks) and instead move forward in a new direction (in this case working with a deck that is newer and shinier). Sometimes we just need a sign that gives us permission to move on from something that isn’t working.
And I can’t deny that the signs have shown me that as much as I want to influence the public policy arena, that we are facing a failure of those systems, an unraveling of the cords that tentatively bound us together. The insurrection opened some deep wounds that won’t heal easily and which will likely challenge our collective vision for our future. My work won’t be as useful when the majority there are trying to desperately patch holes in processes that aren’t working.
As I mentioned last week, I see a fracturing of reality happening in part because we’ve been staring so long at our navels, getting lost in pools of ego and self-pity, that we don’t see that we each have a piece of the larger picture that we can solve. In my corner, I’m helping with food justice and heart-centered leadership. Friends are working toward sexual recovery from trauma and trans rights. Others are working on efficiencies in our environmental impact and others are caring for the children of the people doing these things. We each have an essential role that only we can play.
…and we each have beliefs and fears that keep us from cohesively joining together to manifest these parts into a new system.
I have struggled long and hard with deservingness. The self-loathing voices in my head kept telling me I’m so inherently flawed that others could do my part better than me. And one of the hardest lessons over the last year is that no one else is saying what I say, in the way that I say it to the audience that can hear my influence. And even if they are, it doesn’t matter if I’m the third person to say it, it isn’t my failure if it takes that person four tries for it to finally get through.
This week, in particular, it’s a good time to get out of our own way, to stop trying to discover even more reasons to feel bad about ourselves and instead embrace all the millions of reasons why we should feel proud of where we are and what we have to share with the world.
This week we revisit the Enchanted Map Oracle, a great deck to use at the beginning of the year or for a spiritual check-in. It reminds us to hold space open for compassionate patience and a healthy sense of humor. None of us will be untouched by this upcoming Mercury Retrograde season.
See more below…
Where we are this week
Slow & Steady (R)
There’s an air of impatience hovering over this week. Perhaps it’s our ennui with the continued pandemic or the uncertainty of what comes next. But now that we set our intentions for the year, we’re already growing impatient waiting for the results. We’ve gone to the gym five times now, why don’t we feel better yet? Like Veruca Salt, “we want it now!” But that also can lead to some impulsive decision-making that only takes our immediate desires into account instead of a lager term strategy that we are slowly unraveling to build momentum. Because of the oncoming Mercury Retrograde let’s take a moment to breathe and tune into the present, to value the abundance of small blessings showered on us each day – the rest of our plans are growing, but it will take time.
Avoid impulsive impatience
Messages from our Guides
We keep waiting for the bottom to fall out because we haven’t admitted that we’ve finally reached rock bottom. Change is inevitable. We can’t keep hitting our heads against the brick wall expecting it to change for us. Instead, we need to surrender to the message that our guides have been giving us for the past year – change is inevitable. We can continue clinging and clawing to reach even further into our worst selves, or we can allow ourselves to transform into something with such a light of purity and grace that we cannot help but ascend even higher as we shine. We have reached rock bottom. We can only go up from here.
Surrender to move upward.
Messages from Lady Gaia
A lot has been said in the past two years about conspiracies, secret societies, about distrust of authorities. The moment people see that there is a maze, a system, to how the world operates suddenly they start looking for evildoers behind the scenes who are responsible for designing and trapping people here. This is still taking things from an individualistic point of view, seeing the world still from a limited perspective, from what we’ve seen the few times we peek our heads above the hedge that separates us from others in the same maze. In fact, it is only when we start listening to the perspective of those most trapped within these systems: marginalized, discarded, and demonized by systems of racism and patriarchy, that we can even start to gain the insight we need to understand the full problem and the full solution. When we have the empathy to connect with others we can begin to see through their eyes, to understand how we got here and why the problem is less nefarious and even more impossible than we can comprehend. Unless and until we start agreeing on connecting the dots with one another to create a collective reality, we’ll never be able to resolve systems that harm and traumatize others on our shared planet.
Soar to see above the maze.
Messages from our Ancestors
The power of dreaming is that without the structures of our logical reality to shape our thoughts when we are relaxed and in alignment with ourselves we are able to dream impossible things that can transform our lives. Our ancestors remind us that we need to fully unleash the creative power of our vision. To see our intentions fly through the air, collecting the support and bonus points we need to really achieve our dreams. We need to not only be clear about what we want but to put our full power into launching that arrow that will make it happen no matter how impossible it might be. For when we dream we invite the world to co-create with us.
Visualize clear intentions
Messages from our Future Selves
Spirit of Place (R)
Sometimes we’re jumping at shadows in the dark. Letting the reactions of our ego-self interfere with recognizing the truth of a situation. We worry about the hidden agendas of others, and yet, when we are in alignment with ourselves, we are able to check in with our intuition to know what has integrity and substance and what is just a whisper of reality luring us in. Likewise, when we’re aligned with ourselves, we are less threatened by the illusory and reactive opinions of others. We know we can rely on our wisdom, experience, and knowledge to get us through. So in the end, the hidden agendas matter very little – for when we are secure in ourselves, we are less tethered to the paranoias of fear – which is when we see most clearly.
Align intuitively to see clearly.
Message from Mother Mary
I’ve carried a rosary with me ever since I was a little kid. a modest set of beads to remind me that I’m protected, I’m loved and all I have to do is ask and help can come to me. I’m never fully in it alone. This is how I came to know Mother Mary in my spiritual journeys as a Catholic kid and as more of a feminist pagan gnostic brujera today. I carry little talismans imbued with the power I have gained through the trials of faith I have already survived. These objects, like my rosary, remind me to watch for signals, Mary’s signals, the signals of the invisible forces of the universe that are always flowing through us to give us hope and warning. If we aren’t already carrying these things with us, this is a sign to start doing so…if we are, then pay attention to how those talismans of love call out to us this week. That is is our sign that hope and help are always within reach.
Carry signs of rememberence.
Coming Apart (R)
Detangle from the unraveling reality.
Sacred Pool (R)
Don’t drown in pools of self-pity.
The hidden forces of our week remind us to detangle ourselves from the unraveling of this world. To not get caught up in the cares of the past trying to salvage something that was always meant to transform, that was never going to stay the same shape and size. We need to allow ourselves to detach from the ongoing drama of everything trying to “go back to normal”. Have a sense of humor and allow it to fade into the background as we reach for what is substantively present and overwhelmingly real.
We need to stop digging for reasons why we are unworthy. Perhaps we’ve recently been called out for an insensitive comment or we’ve taken that long hard look in the mirror and didn’t like what we saw. The thing is the more that we dwell on our guilt and perceived ugliness, the less we’re able to reflect what we’ve actually learned. Like Narcissus falling in love with himself and drownign to his detriment, here we run the run the risk of falling so in loathe with ourselves that we’ll drown in pools of our own self-pity. When others try to hold us accountable or when we have decided that change is needed, continuing to dwell on images of a past and more shallow self, we can learn how to use our experience to reflect the beauty of others with compassionate resolve in their worst moments, allowing us to better embrace our full selves in ours as well.
As we approach this Mercury Retrograde, may we have the compassionate patience and optimistic humor to endure the process of growth. May we steady our impulses with awareness that there is a larger world that deserves our full presence and consideration. May we use this time to pull ourselves away from the pits of self-loathing so we may listen to the lessons, better hone our intentions, to ready our aim and intuitively take the right next steps toward a brighter future together.
I am with you always in love 💖
So may it be.