Messages of Divine Love: The Inevitable Choice

January 23, 2023 /Psychic Tarot

Thank you for your understanding over the last week or so. Not only was I traveling to/from New Mexico, but I was struck with waves of grief for the anniversary of my dad’s and grandpa’s deaths two years ago this week. You can see my tribute to my dad on substack. I am just so grateful for the grace I am shown by so many🙏💙

Intro Notes to the Deck & Reading

Out of all my decks, the Psychic Tarot by John Holland is on my frequent flyer list. I use it for all of my reiki sessions and use it weekly to check in with myself. My relationship with this deck is solid. So when I went to use it last week I was met with a ton of reversals. An extraordinary amount of them. Enough that it made me want to reshuffle completely.

And when I did, the EXACT same card that was upright in the prior reading was upright in the second one (Third eye Chakra card). Crazy coincidence right? But even when I went to write it up, tech kept messing up and so much started getting in the way of getting this out. So, I took the Mercury retrograde/anniversary of my dad’s death seriously and backed off.

But then when I went to do the reading with the same deck this week – again I got a ton of reversals. Three times now – even though it’s behaved normally for every other reading. With each card, you’ll hear how it mirrors the one from last week even (though I couldn’t preserve all the photos/write-ups from last week).

This deck wanted to be heard….just like this!

See more below…

Where We Are This Week

Movement, Choices & Decisions (Two of Pentacles/Physical (R))

Solar Plexus Chakra

I guffawed out loud when I saw this because even though I thoroughly shuffled the deck from last week’s not-ready-for-primetime reading, this card was the EXACT SAME CARD that came up last week. I’ll even put the two pieces of advice side by side – because like anything that cares enough to repeat itself – the message is coming through loud and clear this week that we have some inevitable choices we have to make. Last week’s energy was all chaos and swirling energies of change and completion. But this one says “now that the dust is settling, it’s time to make those difficult choices”. The only problem is that we still have the energy of indecision, about everything important which adds pressure to our situation. But with this card in the same position, we are being told, more now than ever, that we have to “roll the hard six” to restore balance to our lives. It is inevitable.

Messages from our Guides

Suffering in Silence (Nine of Swords/Intellect (R))

Crown Chakra

Funny enough there was a reversed nine in this same position as well. Nines in this deck stand for both 9 and 10 in a regular tarot deck – each just being a different snapshot of “the end”. Whether it was the Nine of Wands/Spiritual reversed (like last week) or this week’s nine of swords/intellect we are being asked whether we’re making the right sacrifices for the right reasons. We are closing the doors on several chapters of our lives – both cards speak to a spirit of self-sacrifice (wands – voluntary, swords – involuntary) as a consequence of our actions. But will self-torture and self-sacrifice give us what we want or force the change we want to see in the world? Voluntary, temporary self-restraint or thoughtful redirection to serve a goal is one thing, habitually falling on our swords to please others is another. Take it from someone who knows – the era of self-torment is over.

Messages from Lady Gaia/Mother Earth

Solar Plexus Chakra

Solar Plexus Chakra

Again, we have nearly the same card or type of card in place of last week’s card. The coincidences don’t stop there. Because in both readings, Lady Gaia sang to us not with the dissonant notes of reversals, but with the clear, triumphant cadence of our own energetic bodies.  Last week it was honoring our third eye, this week it’s the confident surety of our solar plexus. If we were questioning our place in this world or the value of our presence, we are assured that not only do we matter, but we are needed. Our light, our fire, our energy is needed to light the world – to wake up humanity from its complacency. Our relationship with mother earth gives us the most powerful gift in the world: purpose.  This card assures us that we have the confidence and sacred power needed to power through the challenges we find in our physical world. Aligning our solar plexus with the physical rhythms and needs of our earthly bodies will be our greatest strength & source of personal empowerment.

Messages from Our Ancestors

Financial & Material Changes (Five of Pentacles/Physical)

Root Chakra

One of the few upright cards this week, we are asked to be mindful when we encounter lack and scarcity in our lives. We could curse the world, pitying ourselves, secure only in our misery. Or we could use those moments to decipher patterns of ancestral wounding in the areas of money, scarcity, hunger, homelessness, or lack. As we gradually move toward a society that recognizes the inherent deservingness of every human for food, shelter, clothing, and medicine, we are continually being challenged to heal the wounds our ancestors bore when it came to wealth and lack, including their role in creating lack for others. For we cannot birth a new world while still nursing the open wounds of the other.  Listen for the patterns, notice the fears, and do more than paper it over with money. When we encounter restrictions or lack, especially financially this week,  notice where we can heal these wounds for ourselves and others. 

Messages from Our Future Selves

Fulfillment of Wishes (Nine of Cups (R))

Heart Chakra

Hey, look! Another nine reversed. Need just one more to finish the set. Remember, these cards are about completion. Here, we have some emotional disappointment: dreams that technically came true but missed the mark. Almost literally like the card last week, we know we’re not quite “winning” yet – but you know what? we aren’t down in the dumps either. We are much better off than when we first started this journey  – something in our lives has changed for the better even if it isn’t quite right….yet! Just because it isn’t everything we hoped for doesn’t mean our dreams didn’t come true. Be more precise with our intentions and more open to the myriad of ways we can receive. When we receive be mindful of how ingratitude can create unworthiness for future abundance. All gifts from the divine are worth celebrating. Sometimes we’re given a taste of success to see if we’re ready for more. Receiving some is better than none at all.

Messages from Mother Mary

Material & Spiritual Prosperity (Six of Pentacles/Physical)

Sacral Chakra

Mirroring the last statement, Mother Mary invites us to err on the side of gratitude and generosity. True generosity flows only with the nourishment of gratitude: a way to bless others for the ways we have been blessed. No matter how small., find corners of gratitude for the blessings we’ve encountered. For only in truly feeling – down in our souls – the true freedom of gratitude can we offer generosity without strings or conditions, restrictions or prerequisites. That is what her son came here to teach that is available to us today and every day. What have we received that we can now cultivate to share with others?


Triumph (Chariot (R))

Throat Chakra

How adorable that last week we had no wind in our sails, but this week we are either a runaway train or a stuck in the mud 🫠 Sorry, but there is no in-between with Chariot reversed this week. Even with Mercury retrograde over, we have a general malaise that is impacting us this week. And that spills over into our personal and work relationships in the form of impulsively offensive things that fall out of our mouths or just flubbing the words by accident. So don’t be surprised if we have to slow ourselves down all week to correct false assumptions. Not just the ones others make about us that we’re so quick to defend, but the ones that we make about others we’re so quick to dismiss. Listen and watch for feedback about pathological stereotyping we might be doing or how we hide the truth behind generic assumptions. Own them and correct them.

Final Advice

Heart Chakra (R)

Heart Chakra

If I had gotten the post up last week, you would have heard me wax poetic about how we can now start welcoming love into our lives. Except for some of us last week, we had that opportunity and we found some wounds in our hearts we didn’t expect. An ache, a longing that on the one hand reminds us that we’re still alive, but on the other makes us afraid we’ll never be truly worthy of the love we want. We are so used to the numbness, that the newness of new friends, lovers or chosen family might cause us to shut down out of shock. Never fear friends, the cure isn’t so distant as we might think. The overall advice is simply to sit with our emotions and do some directed healing of the heart chakra in particular. Listen to heart chakra music, keep stones that charge this chakra on your desk or in your pocket, hug a puppy, listen to a child’s laugh, watch a romantic movie with your beloved(s), and just let yourself FEEL whatever it is you feel. Even if all we do is find the areas of our lives where we are ignoring our hearts in favor of people pleasing, we are closer than we think. The appearance of stoicism isn’t fooling anyone. It’s time, to be honest, and vulnerable, especially with ourselves.

Parting words

The choices we are faced with making might feel impossible – like choosing to leave an entire identity or way of being behind because it is holding us back from our ambitions. But trying to burn the candle at both ends, jumping through hoops excessively to please others, or trying to patch together a failing relationship under the threat of retraumatization is no longer a winning strategy (was it ever?!) And right now, the rubber is about to hit the road – we are nearing a crossroads that we cannot avoid any longer and we will have to choose. And if we don’t, the universe will choose for us – and what wants that?

Remember, I am with you always in love 💖

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